A Hearty Toast To Scott Lively For Showing Us Who The Nazis Really Are.

I very much doubt many of you outside the gay world would know the name Scott Lively. He’s a born again smack head evangelist (or Jesus on a stick waving multi-millionaire businessman) who would have us all believe that gay people were responsible for the Nazi Holocaust.

As a leap of logic, that takes some doing, especially when you read up on what German Evangelicals were saying about Kristallnacht. As a matter of fact, these ideas might just as well have told him by some purple swan on one of his drug laden trips, in terms of pure reality.

However Lively has been keeping the crowds in South African countries like Uganda entertained by spreading as holy truth that all gay people are rampantly promiscuous disease carrying child rapists who god wants exterminated. This has proven such a hit there that they have allowed him to come up with christian laws to regulate it. Laws such as the threat of life time prison sentences for known gays and people who know gay people yet do not report them to the authorities. This was originally going to be a death penalty until somebody read up on the Warsaw Ghetto and realized the same laws applied there. (Death penalty for any Jews trying to escape the ghetto, death penalty for any Pole who “helped Jews in any way: by taking them in for the night, or giving them lifts in any vehicles” passed in 1941 by Governor Hans Frank). Such a close resemblance to a regime the world now condemns would after all be bad publicity were it to become generally known.

Needless to say, the Christian populations of Uganda and Nigeria took this holy sublime holy teaching to heart and both Protestant and Catholic hierarchies signed the bill into law. And great was the rejoicing thereof.

Even the Muslims have taken a stand, setting up sharia courts to try and execute any sodomite caught practicing. Not quite so bothered with their own home issues of child marriage, celebrations of Muslim Ashura festivals involving the slicing of children’s heads with cut throat razors, nor even with the vile practice of Bacha Bazi ( wealthy Muslim men getting underage boys dressed as girls to dance for them before taking them off for sex), these holy ones would rather be stringing up two people of the same age involved in a loving partnership and inflicting harm on nobody. That’s what their god tells them and that’s how its gonna be.

There is a certain delicious irony involved here, major religions coming together to round up and slaughter minorities instead of each other. Particularly when it comes to committing a major act of cultural suicide on such a level. I mean who, after this, is going to take the claims of some grinning parson or beardy Imam seriously when they talk of divine love and how they mean no harm by their actions.

So thank you Scott “Smackhead” Lively. You have single handedly shot your own particular brand of religion through the heart and are helping your Muslim brethren give humanity further cause for dismissing them as lunatic savages. Why preach that gay people are out to destroy religion when you are doing a perfectly good job of it yourself?

Just one thing bothers me though, smackhead. You seem to be very quiet over the fact that the bible spends more time condoning slavery than it does condemning homosexuality. Surely a man of your sublime holiness is aware that the abolition of slavery has no place in the Bible. Surely the holy spirit must have informed you that the biblical position is that it’s ok if regulated properly (i.e. by Exodus 21). Your fellow Evangelical, George Whitefield, campaigned successfully in post abolition Georgia for its restitution waving Jesus on a stick around after all.

Surely you are not afraid to preach the WHOLE Gospel now are you? I’m sure the people of Uganda and Nigeria will welcome you with open arms when you tell them the full TRUTH of scripture.

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